Quite a few times in my coaching career I’ve encountered siblings playing on the same team.
As a coach, how do you approach dealing with sibling rivalry?
Share your tips and best practices!
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Coach Sean Ferguson ChPC, RGP – Swimming – Region of Waterloo – 17 Years
“The best way is to proactively encourage skills and abilities of each “individual”; give each sibling the opportunity to shine individually. As well, in my opinion, just cause they are siblings, doesn’t mean there needs to be a rivalry; coach and mentor these athletes on how they can work together with their specific skills & abilities for the team to come to be one unit. When you give each individual an opportunity to use their own skills and abilities it allows each person to find their way (which in turn should prevent any rivalry).
*By the way, I would like to mention that there is a distinct difference between rivalry and being competitive or having friendly competition (as this can easily be confused). So this is also something you as the coach can lead your team in learning about the differences.”
Coach Briana Rodrigues – Athletics/Running – Toronto – 4 Years
“I think a good way to diffuse sibling rivalry or rivalry of any kind, is to focus on what is not common between the siblings. Invariably there will be some differentiating skill between the two, such as one being slightly faster while potentially the other one is a better team player. It’s a coach’s challenge to find something for each. Then focus on that instead of what they have in common. That can channel the energy into something more positive for each kid and maybe even get them encouraging one another instead of competing with one another.”
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Success in team sports requires teamwork. A group’s ability to move as one and work for each other. This isn’t always a given.
As a coach, what is your approach to building team chemistry?
Coach Joe Benedetti – Softball-Fastpitch – Hamilton
“I think I got 55% in Chemistry in Grade 12 many years ago, but I do know you have to know the substances you are dealing with. Team chemistry starts with getting to know your teammates on, but mostly OFF the field. I learned from a mentor, the late Gil Read, that if you want to have a good party at the end of the season, have about 6 parties during the year. Gil would invite the team and parents and families over for pool parties at his home. Simple activities like seeing a less skilled player doing amazing dives and swimming like a dolphin, helps players gain a wider perspective of their teammates.
Coaches can do many things to develop team chemistry, like encouraging carpooling, and so many other “getting to know your teammates” activities. Keep the following objective in mind – Ask yourself the question: “Can I honestly say my athletes are as happy for their teammate’s success as they are their own?” A tough question, but we all know the power of team spirit. Creating lasting friendships is a key goal of any coach, and it starts with team chemistry.”
Coach Henry D – Ice Hockey – Hamilton – 12 Years
“Developing team chemistry on and off the field is very important. Group events such as chain gang runs, scavenger hunts, and Altitude climbing at McMaster University are great ways to develop a positive team culture. Events that physically bind players together force them to work together and trust each other; your team leaders usually surface at these events as well. We have also done a team cooking class to teach nutrition and promote a healthy lifestyle.
Establishing formal team goals and objectives are very important as well as establish the team’s values and set a standard to measure their success and failures. Having the players contribute goes a long way as they’ll have a personal stake in defining what’s important to the team.”
Coach Dallas Price – Rugby – Toronto – 3 Years
“I think a bonding event is good. I ran a ‘fun’ practice last year. I surprised them at a regularly scheduled practice with a scavenger hunt. I made up teams with girls that didn’t really know each other as well. By the end, they all had gotten to interact in many different ways than on the field. It helps them communicate more effectively when they do get back on the field.”
Coach Amanda Miles – Basketball – Markham – 10 Years
“I am a firm believer in team events outside of the court. I often have my players go out to dinners together or if we are away at a tournament having a fun night at a local activity hall (in Toronto Dave and Busters is good, or in London, we go to The Palasad). I want them to do activities that are fun and do not focus on basketball, that allow them to interact and get to know each other in a different way.”
Coach Scott Weldon – Recreation Hockey & Competitive Soccer – Hamilton – 24 Years
“My objectives as a coach are simple:
(A) Everyone sees the field in every game. This approach does not fall under the statement that ‘everyone pays the same so everyone plays the same’. Not the case.
Players come to the sport with different skillsets and different abilities. You can assign a number to each player reflecting their soccer acumen. Too often coaches start their “10’s” in most situations they deem as necessary or critical. If we, as a coach, are looking to develop a roster of players do we not have to acknowledge the ‘6/7’ who is playing at an ‘8/9/10’ level by playing them more. And when the player that is capable of playing at a ‘10’ is playing down to a ‘7’ shouldn’t they play less?
Both players need to understand clearly what is expected of them and what should result in more consistent, better performances from everyone – Exactly the outcome needed to succeed and so desperately sought by coaches.
(B) The corollary to everyone sees the field is that you have addressed the primary wish (most often implied not expressed) of every player: “Make me feel important”. Nothing discredits or devalues a player like taking the long walk back to the car after sitting on the bench for a game, especially after a road game. (As troubling is seeing the player’s struggle to explain a coach’s decision to sit out the game when queried by parents.)
“That’s what happens in competitive soccer” is something that a coach says to anyone within earshot to justify their actions. As if saying it out loud makes the statement true.”
Coach Mike Miller – Soccer – Milton/Halton – 25+ Years
“In chemistry, there are interactions between atoms and molecules. The molecule that you get is based on the atoms that you have and how they have reacted to form the final product. Team chemistry is similar in that some people have the potential to react well to others while some people can react badly. What you hope to achieve is something where the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.
Team Chemistry begins with team selection. If a superstar player, or a player who gets limited playing time, causes adverse reactions for or destabilizes, the team, then the coach has expended energy to deal with it. Guus Hiddink, when assembling the South Korean National soccer team for the 2002 World Cup, chose not to select some of the best players in that nation at that time because of the negative effect they would have on team chemistry. He chose, instead, to go with a group of players who may have had the lesser skill, but could perform together as a team. The result was that they made it to the semi-finals of the tournament.
Once the team is assembled, a great way to promote team chemistry is to actually listen to the team and involve them in as many decisions as you can so that they have ownership and autonomy. In this way, they will feel respected and will respond accordingly.“
As a coach, how do you approach simulating competition during practice?
Coach Jackie Smith– Basketball – Toronto – 10 Years
“Simulating competition is a process and art and all about the rivalry.
To replicate the intensity, speed, the tenacity of a game environment is very challenging. My approach begins on day 1 and takes time to create. Beginning to create a culture of healthy competitiveness, rivalry and challenge is key to simulating game day. Similar to the intrinsic drive and motivation of Magic Johnson vs Larry Bird, neither player would be outworked by the other, the same mindset and drive need to be created in your practice. To create an environment where players can compete, challenge, develop rivals in an appropriate, sportsmanship like and respectful environment is about education, opportunity and matching skill to challenge.
Players begin with being introduced to an opportunity to compete within parameters of team and sportsmanship like principles with appropriate matchups. Over time ensure that the dynamics of the competitors foster challenge and skill development. As time goes on this dynamic if managed properly will foster a relationship where players push each other and challenge each other and thus a rivalry ensues. These rivalries will create a game-like intensity, speed and tenacity that coaches love to see. To replicate the environment. Loud music. Spectators at practice. Adapt equipment. Modify the setting to suit the situation you are trying to mimic.”
“The use of Global-Analytical-Global methodology is gaining traction in soccer. So is the use of functional practices, phase of play practices and the use of small-sided games. Let the game be the teacher. Recreate situations that happen in a game in your practices, in the parts of the field where they typically happen. Make sure that the practice is orientated the same way as the game (from end to end rather than going from sideline to sideline). The unconscious reading of visual cues is important for player development. Have the players use the ball as much as possible, including in their warm-up and their cool down.”
Coach Mike Hogg – Basketball –Norfolk County – 47 Years
End of close game foul shooting can be an intimidating experience for the young athlete. So during practice, we make sure we try to re-create an anxiety-producing environment for the athlete.
“Near the end of the practice, when the athletes are somewhat fatigued, we have a refereed controlled scrimmage. When a foul occurs, we follow this procedure:
We set the scoreboard to a one, two, or zero point difference, line up the athletes properly at the foul line and have the parents and any other on-lookers make encouraging (or discouraging) noises. Then all is very silent during the shot. We can add other distractions as we see fit.
Our athletes have been trained to focus only on their routine for shooting foul shots, and block out any distractions, whether external or internal and, for us, this is a great way to practice this skill.”
Coach Brenda Lanois – Trampoline/Gymnastics – Pembroke – 28 Years
“In the weeks leading up to a competition, the athlete will perform their routines and be marked on them as if they were actually at a competition. From there, they will perform their routines before all the other gymnasts and trampolinists in the gym. They will officially be introduced and walk onto the trampoline, they will acknowledge the “judges”, perform their routines, stop and address the audience, and leave as if they were at a competition.”
Coach Colin Walker – Volleyball – Ottawa – 30+ Years
“Every drill ends with a goal to be met. Sometimes the athlete is against themselves (beat your previous best), sometimes groups are against each other (first to a set number wins, which group can go the longest, etc..) or a full team drill where a specific goal needs to be met to end the drill. Also, small-sided games are used regularly with a variety of consequences for losing or winning. End of every practice we have some form of competition to see you will be taking down the net. In the past, I have created a ladder where we post results from serving reception practice stats, serving stats, etc… We constantly talk about challenging yourself to improve to embrace the competition versus fearing it. You’re not always going to win but you can always try to put your best effort forward to see what will happen. That is your biggest competition, consistency in putting your best effort forward. It is the only thing the athlete can fully control.”
Coach Jodi Gram – Basketball – Markham – 10 Years
“Every “drill” is planned to fit into the bigger picture. We do drills in which players understand the context of where, why and when it is taking place. This allows me as the coach to hold them to very specific standards that have been set and are mutually understood on what those actions should look like and sound like. Error detection and correction is not in the abstract, but is immediately transferable instead, and is more likely to show up in real game situations because it has been meaningfully practiced.”
Coach Neale Gillespie – CAC – Ottawa – 20 Years
“Competition simulations are a great tool to work on developing a competitive edge and decision making under pressure. During any activity in a training session, the competitive environment can be simulated. Simple things like increasing speed or intensity, closing down space, or adding additional options for increased decision making are all part of simulating the competitive environment. Ensuring the training environment replicates the competitive one is essential as well. For example, training in a loud environment and competing in a quiet one can be challenging for athletes. Pay attention to the little things. The key is relating everything you do to a game-like setting. Competition is inherent in the sport. Take advantage of it in your training!”
Coach Brock Ross – Running – Toronto – 2 Years
“Occasionally throwing in some friendly races and competitions among a team can be a good simulation when you’re dealing with a highly competitive personality of some athletes. Also working on visualization techniques is always important.”
